Television's Redneck Renaissance

We are in the midst of a Renaissance, my friends, a Redneck Renaissance.  As pointed out in a recent article on Cracked.com, the new trend in reality television has been to focus on the Southern working class.  Previously America has focused on the grotesquely super-wealthy such as Paris Hilton and the Kardashians.  And let's not forget the horribly wretched man known as Donald Trump.

I have read that this shift is caused by the economic crisis we have been mired in the last several years.  Americans simply can't stomach the super-rich anymore.  They are much happier seeing people that they can either relate with or look down their nose at.  We feel better watching the folksy then the wealthy.  This has caused Television to shift its focus towards The South, as folksiness and poor people are our two main exports.  I wanted to take a look at some of the shows in the Redneck Renaissance and see how they reflect on The South.

Fiction

True Blood

True Blood is one of the most popular shows in the Vampire Renaissance and is the only one to take place in the South.  The show doesn't spend all that much time exploring Southern Culture and focuses most of its energy on drinking blood and having freaky sex.

There is a cast of Southern Characters (most played by foreign actors of course).  While alot of the Southern Characters are portrayed in a positive light there is a fair share of stereotypes.  There is a bumbling Southern Sheriff and The Rednecks have switched from being racist against black people and are now racist against vampires.  Of course this creates a moral quandary as the Vampires are actually pretty evil, so their racism is somewhat justified.


The main character is Sookie Stackhouse, a psychic waitress who falls in love with Vampires.

In the book series Sookie is potrayed as a strong female lead who is fiercely independent.  Here character is somewhat different in the show as she as portrayed as uneducated and helpless.  The book was written by a Southerner, the show was not.  I have to believe that the show felt that her character needed to be dumbed down due to her Southerness.

Racist rednecks and ignorant yokels do not say to much positive about the South.  However, it is nice to see the South featured on such a prominent show, and they definitely capture the Southern Gothic feel.

The Walking Dead

For some reason all fictional shows about the South focus around bloodsucking monsters.  The Walking Dead takes place in the area around Atlanta, GA and is filmed on location.  All the characters are portrayed as incredibly foolish.  They sleep in tents knowing there are swarms of zombies on the loose, despite that there are plenty of empty buildings to hide in.

The group of survivors' leader Rick Grimes, a former Sheriff who is from the area.  Despite this he talks about finding snow mobiles for use during the winter, despite the fact that it never snows in Atlanta.  Rick should know this.  In Rick's defense, he was in a coma at the beginning of the show and may have suffered brain damage, but this does not explain why the rest of the group made him the leader.

In all honestly I don't think they are trying to portray Southerners as idiots, it may just be that the writers are idiots.

How the show reflects on the South can be examined in two characters: Brothers Merle and Daryl Dixon.

This is Merle Dixon, who pretty much sums up everything negative you could think of about the South.  Despite the fact that the world has ended and there is only a small pool of survivors Merle still manages to be incredibly racist and sexist to the point that it puts everyone in danger.  He is a belligerent Meth addict and has no redeeming qualities.

However......

This is Merle's brother Daryl Dixon.  He is pure redneck and is the most popular character on the show.  While the rest of the survivors flop around like a bunch of helpless idiots Daryl shows that he is the most prepared due to redneck upbringing.  He is a zombie killing machine.  In a way Daryl is a great ambassador for Redneck Culture.  When the shit goes down we are going to need rednecks to save our asses.

Reality Television

I will not discuss how authentic any of the following reality shows are.  As Pro-Wrestling as taught us, it is best not to ask such questions.

Swamp People

Swamp People is a show about alligator hunters in the Swamps of New Orleans.  One thing that always stands out about this show to me is how insanely tough these guys are.  In one episode a guy gets shot in the eye (by his dad) and still spends the whole day hunting (including catching an alligator with a hand thrown grappling hook).  At the end of the episode his mom picks the bullet out of his eyeball.

The show is pretty straight forward in showing this culture.  The only way this could possibly reflect negatively on Southern Culture is some of the questionable decisions made the hunters, such as pulling a live alligator into your boat or sticking your entire arm in swamp water to grab a hooked alligators.

The star of the show is Troy Landry, know for his catch-phrase "Chut-Em"!

Troy has parlayed his fame into other business ventures as he appears at Bass Pro Shops around the country to sign autographs.  He also is the spokesmen for Tony Chachere's Creole Seasoning.  People may laugh at Troy's accent, but he laughs his way to the bank.

Call of the Wildman

Call of the Wildman is a reality show that focuses on Ernie Brown, better know as "The Turtleman".  The Turtleman is a professional nuisance animal remover.  The catch is that Turtleman uses no tools whatsoever, catching animals with his bare hands.  Turtleman is endlessly good natured and goofy.  He yells out ridiculous catch-phrases and flashes his toothless grin.  He always appears way over excited and dives into dangerous situations seemingly unprepared, much like a redneck Steve Erwin.

The show has been criticized for being exploitative and showing Turtleman and his friend as redneck fools.  I would tend to reject these criticisms as the show has a very positive vibe to it.  While Turtleman appears crazy and reckless he always wins and never hurts himself or the animals.  Turtleman shows that someone can be unorthodox and unusual but still be the best at what they do.  I think it can be summed up when two little kids on the show declared that Turtleman was the "The Greatest Man They Have Ever Met". 

Duck Dynasty

Duck Dynasty is the tale of the Robertson family, who own made a fortune off making Duck Calls.  Unlike most Southerns on reality TV they have a large amount of money.  The family takes pride in the "Redneck" label, which is explained in great detail by narrator and Redneck Philosopher Jase Robertson.  While the Robertsons engage in such foolish activities such as putting an RV in a tree and hunting wild honey with a vacuum cleaner they are generally portrayed as just wanting to have a good time.  Talking head shots show that they are fully aware that what they are doing is ridiculous.  The show generally does not resort to cheap stupid-redneck humor and shows three dimensional characters.  I find that a lot of Southerners appreciate the show and relates to the family's life style and philosophy. 

Alot of the humor comes from the family's loveable "Uncle Si".

Si is the wackiest of the Robertson clan with his long rambling stories and goofy catch phrases.  He only drinks sweet tea and only drinks out of a single tupperware cup that his mom sent him while he served in Vietnam.   While some may see Si's foolishness as negative reflection of the South, I think everyone in the entire country has a hysterically weird Uncle.

Here Comes Honey Boo Boo

"Honey Boo Boo" is by far the most controversial show of the Redneck Renaissance.  The show is a spin-off of the somewhat horrifying "Toddlers in Tiaras".  The show centers around 6 year old Alana Thompson and here family.  They are a working class family from Georgia that center their attention around Alana and her beauty pageants.  Alana is ridiculously out of control and sassy.  The family engages in such ridiculous activities such as blindfolding each other and trying to guess the smell of eachother's breath.  The family revels in their redneck status and have popularized the term "You better Redneck-ognize!"

The show has been harshly criticized as being nothing more then a white trash minstrel show.  I can't sit here and pretend that there isn't a sort of car crash appeal to this show, but I can tell you one thing:  This show is reality.  I know people who live like this and in the end there is nothing wrong with the way they act.  The family is close, they love each other and have pride in who they are and where they are from.  Alana and her family have done work for anti-bullying campaigns.  They have also shown that the South is not entirely populated by bigots as the family is completely accepting of their openly gay "Uncle Poodle". 

I'll go on the record and say they are good honest people......plus, Honey Boo Boo liked the Carpetbagger on facebook..........

Psssst.....Update on the Redneck Renaissance here

The Carpetbagger

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Midwestern Roadtrip

Before I became a dirty Carpetbagger I grew up in the Midwest.  My mother lived in Valparaiso, IN and my father lived in Milwaukee, WI and I split time between the two.  This Christmas I loaded my family in the car to visit family and maybe check out a few roadside attractions on the way there.

Our first pit stop was in Louisville, KY where we stopped to see the world's largest baseball bat.

That's my daughter there at the bottom.  When she realized that the bat was made of fiberglass and not wood she declared that it was "stupid" and a waste of time.

True, its not wood, but it is very very big.

Next stop is the town I grew up in: Valparaiso, IN.  Valparaiso is known for one man and one man only.

That man is Orville Redenbacher, the guy whose picture is on your popcorn right now.

Orville was from Valparaiso and he would come visit once a year at our local "Popcorn Festival'.  Here is a picture I took of him when I was 12.

In 1995 when I went to start my paper route I saw a shocking headline:  "Town Hero Dies".  Orville had drowned in his hot tub in California.  A town mourned.

But now Valparaiso has done its proper civic duty and erected a statue to its town hero.

The detail is almost unsettling!

As we headed north to Milwaukee we stopped to pick up the two things that fuel our Wisconsin trip: Cheese and defective Jelly Beans.

Next stop is the Jelly Belly Warehouse Tour in Pleasant Prairie, WI.

Now keep in mind this is not a "factory tour", you will not see Jelly Beans being made.  It is a "warehouse tour" meaning you will be riding a tram around a bunch of cardboard boxes.  They do however have a couple flat screen TVs showing you how Jelly Beans are made.

They also have a shrine to Ronald Reagan.

You see, in the Jelly Bean world Ronald Reagan is considered royalty on account of the fact that he liked eating Jelly Beans.

They also have Jelly Bean art portraying Reagan as superman.

While there we loaded up on "Belly Flops" which are defective and misshapen Jelly Bellies sold at half price.

You can also buy strange and rare flavors, but we passed on that.

Yummy!

Next we stop to stock up on cheese curds at the Mars Cheese Castle just a few miles down the road from the Jelly Bean Factory.

They have recently moved to this shiny new building.  I miss their old folksy location, but they did keep their classic old sign.

Note that the Green Bay Packers flag is flown at full mast, just as the America Flag.  This is Wisconsin!

Now much like Valparaiso, Milwaukee has a bronze statue of their icon.  However, Milwaukee's is a fictional character:  Arthur Fonzerelli:  The Fonz.

Behold: "The Broze Fonz"

But the Fonz is not the only iconic statue in Milwaukee.  I set out on foot and hunted down the statue of King Gambrinus: The man who invented beer.

He is located near the old Pabst Brewery, which I'm guessing is some sort of hipster mecca.

On my daughters last birthday we took her to the NC Zoo.  Going there she had one mission: To see Wilhelm the Polar Bear.

Wilhelm is the beloved Polar Bear that normally resides at the North Carolina Zoo.  He was rescued from a Mexican Circus were he lived in a tank full of hot water under a roller coaster.  His head is misshapen due to malnutrition and neglect.  My daughter was heartbroken when we found that Wilhelm had moved and was now staying at the Milwaukee zoo. 

So, we could not visit Milwaukee without seeing Wilhelm. We braved the freezing cold and snow to visit Wilhelm at last.

My daughter got to see her polar bear and I got to see a bunch of cool vintage Mold-a-rama machines.

Oh yeah, there was some other animals too............

We finish our trip with a visit to the Milwaukee Public Museum.  Growing up this building was possibly my most favorite place in the universe.  I would beg my father to take me constantly me, my brother and my cousin would have every inch committed to memory.

I got to visit all my old friends....

The fake old lady who scared the hell out of me as a kid....

The creepy shrunken heads that scared the hell out of me as a kid.....

And who could forget the ultra gory dinosaur scene that scared the shit out of me as a kid...........

I do believe in this building my love for taxidermy and creepy mannequins was born....

It was great to visit my family and check out the roadside stops, but the South has something the Midwest never will: a decent climate.


The Carpetbagger

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Ode to the Street Preacher

 
Well, the Mayan apocalypse has come and gone and we are all inexplicably still alive.  Its a major disappointment for doomsday fanatics.  After last year's apocalyptic no-show this must seem like this world is never going to end.

I wanted to take a few minutes to shine the spotlight on those of use who enjoy letting us know when the next apocalypse is around the corner:  The Street Preacher.  He is always there to remind us what we are doing wrong and to scare us with the consequences.   Next time you find yourself uncomfortably walking past one trying not to make eye contact, take a moment to nod and thank them for making life a little more interesting.

 The large cross they carry is a very popular accessory, and there is no reason to be impractical about it either.  A simple hinge can make it much easier to carry.

Not all of them are as friendly as this young fellow.......When I was in college this guy was a recurring sight on our campus.........

This guy really really hated gay people.....and he wasn't a very big fan of catholics, darwinists or anyone else for that matter.

Its not a purely Southern thing either......check out this guy from Time Square in New York.

That's much more crazy and confusing then any of these other guys....

The problem is that what these guys have in message they lack in presentation.  Which brings me to my personal favorite street preacher:  Brother Obidiah Franklin.

Obidiah posses as a human statue in all red.  When he draws curious on-lookers he is happy to talk to them and has a very warm demeanor.  He uses donations from churches to travel around the country spreading his word.  He was happy to pose for pictures.  His only request is that his face not be photographed.  He says it takes away from his message.  He assured me the sign and arrow above him were pure coincidence.

The Carpetbagger

Please feel free to e-mail me at jacobthecarpetbagger@gmail.com
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