We live in a country where we all have the absolute right to express our religious belief. Some people take full advantage of this right. Sometimes these expressions come off as a bit strange or misplaced. Here are a few that have made me scratch my head.
Doggie Stylz
The little Jesus fish in the corner of signs is fairly common around here. Its a little wink to let you know they are a Christian business, so you don't accidentally take your dog to a groomer who worships Satan. I do have to wonder, would Jesus really want to be associated with a dog groomer named after a human sex act?
Jesus can sell anything
Apparently association with with Christianity can sell anything including Chocolate, Beef Jerky and Giant Snakes.
Dairy Queen says "No" to the Devil
Its not unusual for a church to have a sign outside emblazoned with religious messages. What is a little unusual is for Dairy Queen to talk about Satan on their sign. They also play gospel music inside.
Who Would Jesus Kick?
This
one really confused me. I figured one karate chop is as effective as
any other. Maybe having God on your side may make your punches a little
more deadly. Actually, this was explained to me. Martial arts are
generally associated to some degree with eastern religious beliefs.
There is a group of people who want to learn to kick ass, but are
uncomfortable with the idea of dabbling in Buddhism, so they replace the
eastern elements with Christian religious ideals.
Driving the point home
This business obviously did not feel like putting a fish symbol was adequate in showing how Christian they really are. Not only do they have to put the word "Christian" right in there name, but they have to drive the point home by showing a wrench with angel wings. No one is doubting their Christian cred.
One of my biggest secrets and guilty pleasures is that I have always been a fan of Professional Wrestling. Its has always been something I have felt a little weird talking about and admitting. Wrestling does have a certain stigma attached to it. Unlike "traditional" sports it's not a genuine athletic contest. While wrestling is definitely a show of athletic feets, the biggest draw has always been its drama and storylines.
That is what makes wrestling better then all other sports. "Real" sports just don't have the same drama. Have you ever seen two boxers fight over one eating the other's dog? Or maybe straight up try to murder each other on live TV. Have the Chicago Bears ever snuck onto the field during a game with another team and cost the Green Bay Packers a game.
This drama and insanity gives Pro Wrestling the edge over any other sport.
I remember my first experience with the world of pro wrestling. I was 11 years old spending the night at a friend's house and he flipped WWF wrestling on TV and I was hooked for life.
Take a look. That is the Ultimate Warrior, a face painted tassel covered maniac, wrestling Sgt. Slaughter, an American military man that has defected to supporting Iraq. The match is interrupted by an invincible zombie coming out of a casket and then the day being saved by none other then Mr. Hulk Hogan. Watch that clip and tell me that you don't love wrestling.
After moving to the South I noticed a new kind of wrestling, one I never realized existed: local wrestling. This is were we can watch people in our own community dress in wild costumes and battle each other in simulated combat.
I was both intrigued and a little frightened when I finally worked up the nerve to go to one of the local shows. Now, as a kid I had seen live wrestling and had been to Wrestlemania 13, but nothing could prepare me for what a blast this would be.
Me, my son and two of his friends would go to the national guard armory and check out the the local wrestling federation. We sat so close to the ring that the wrestler's spit and sweat flew on us.
The crowd was totally into it, screaming and cussing at the wrestlers. The wrestler's would even let the audience get physically involved as the good guys would hold the bad guys and let audience members (usually girls) slap their chests.
This old lady even got a little carried away and attacked the bad guys.
After my first show I was hooked and continued attending the various wrestling shows through out Western North Carolina.
One of the craziest things is what these guys were willing to do to their bodies in order to entertain the audience. Keep in my mind that they receive no compensation and are doing this for "fun".
Check this out
And this
This guy let someone drop him face first into a pile of thumb tacks.
His mother actually ran to ring and begged him to stop wrestling. Don't look to close, or you will see the thumb tacks stuck in his forehead.
I think my favorite part of the experience is the crazy characters you come across.
This is Simon Sermon. He is was one of the main bad guys. I looked him up online and it turns out that he has released a documentary about himself being an openly gay wrestler. Traditionally homosexual characters in wrestling such as Gorgeous George and Goldust have been portrayed as effeminate, cowardly, and perverted. Simon's goal is to fight stereotypes and just be a wrestler who just happens to be gay.
He was great at playing the part of the villain and getting the crowd riled up and hating him.
As I was taking pictures. He stopped to spit right at me. It was awesome.
This is the Man they call "Cornbread"
He is one of the most popular wrestler's in the area and gets some of the loudest cheers. Cornbread is actually the alter ego of this man.
The local High School Band teacher. Cornbread receives huge support from his band students, as they show up in droves at local events and in one instance bombarded his opponents with actual hunks of cornbread.
Another one of the locals that is extremely popular is Billy "The Redneck" Starr.
Despite looking like a guy that would roof your house, he had an odd charisma. My son and his friends had him sign their bodies.
This is probably my favorite local wrestler is the mysterious "Goatboy". He comes out to the ring with "Land Down Under" by Men at Work blaring over the intercom. While wrestling he acts like an actual Goat while his opponent loudly complains that he should not be forced to wrestle and animal.
Here are some more of the colorful characters the frequent local wrestling matches
It isn't all for local boys, every once in awhile a big name wrestler from days gone by will show up.
Here is the Barbarian who wrestled for WWF and WCW during the 80s and 90s.
Here is Ricky Morton, legendary underdog, who has wrestled for every organization under the sun for the last several decades
Here is Al Snow who wrestled for WWF in the 90s. He was known best for talking to a severed mannequin head, for some reason he didn't bring the head.
So there you have it. Wrestling is the only sport worth watching, and the bush league is way more awesome then the stuff on TV. Visit your local National Guard Armory or High School Gym NOW!
For some reason I always get a kick out of seeing famous people's graves, however one thing I have learned is that hunting for graves can be incredibly difficult and time consuming (Step 1: Make sure you are in the right Cemetery.)
North Carolina has an odd distinction in having the largest population of famous twins buried in its soil. The first of such twins I tracked down were Chang and Eng Bunker.
Chang and Eng are the original Siamese twins. Not that they were the first to be born with the disorder, but rather the actual term "Siamese Twins" comes from the fact that the brothers were born in Siam. Chang and Eng would become world famous sideshow performers in the 1800s. After a series of events they would wind up as wealthy plantation owners living in mountains of NC. They married Irish sisters and split time between two homes fathering many children in what must have been an awkward living arrangement. One night Chang passed away due to his excessive alcoholism (Eng did not drink at all). Eng would die the same day. On the official birth certificate Eng's cause of death is marked as "dieing of fright". This would insinuate that he died from from fear of being attached to a corpse, but which I must admit, does sound very scary.
On my trip to Mt. Airy, NC (the town that Mayberry is based on) I set out to find their grave. This was a few years before I got a smart phone and I didn't really do alot of planning, so it ended up taking quite awhile. I found that wondering around town asking folksy looking old men was not the best way to go about things. The only advise I got was to go to the funeral home and ask. Unfortunately, the funeral home was closed. So after hours of driving around on the phone with my wife, trying to figure out where I was I finally stumbled upon the right cemetery.
And then I had to wonder around the graveyard while my wife explained what the stone looked like. I finally found it before it was too dark to take a picture.
Also, here is Eng's grandson Woo
The second set of Siamese twins I tracked down are Daisy and Violet Hilton who are buried in Charlotte, NC.
Wikipedia
The reason for Daisy and Violet ending up in NC is a little bit more depressing. Like Chang and Eng the Hilton sisters toured the world. They would be featured in Todd Browning's cult classic film Freaks. The twins would do the their last performance in Charlotte, NC, when their manager would abandon them and run off will all their money. The twins would die penniless in Charlotte.
I drove three hours to see this grave, again with not enough preparation and not realizing that the Cemetery would be massive. Wondering around the cemetery reading every grave stone proved very ineffective. I eventually worked up the nerve to go inside the funeral home and ask. Strangely enough, the woman in the front office had no idea that the twins were buried in the cemetery, but did remember them from when she was growing up in Charlotte. The lady had remembered that the twins had worked as cashiers at the local grocery store, ringing and bagging groceries at the same time.
The grocery store Daisy and Violet worked at
The lady found another lady who was kind enough to take time away from directing a funeral to drive me out and show me the grave.
Thompson?
As it turns out the sisters were too poor at the time of their death to afford their own grave stone, so the Thompson family allowed them to use half of their friend Troy Thompson's grave and be buried in his plot.
Now there is actually one more set of Siamese twins buried in NC, but sadly I have not yet made it out to see them, but it remains firmly on my bucket list.
Millie and Christine McCoy were a pair of Siamese Twins born to slaves in Whiteville, NC. Hopefully I can make it out there to pay my respects.
Keep in mind though, not all famous twins are attached to each other.
Have you seen this iconic picture?
Property of Guinness
I remember seeing it in a Guinness World's Records book as in elementary school. They are the McCrary Twins, the largest twins that ever lived. The brothers were also professional wrestlers, where they went by the name "The McGuire Brothers". They stated that they did not use their real names when wrestling because when they wrestled in Japan the announcers would have difficult saying their names and referred to them as the "Queery" brothers. In their own words "we ain't no queers".
I was elated to find out that the twins were buried in Hendersonville, NC not to far from where I live and I managed to visit them before the sun went down on my way back from seeing the Hilton sister's grave.
Now that is a grave that does the twins justice.
The North Carolina Tourism Bureau really needs to play up the famous twin angle a little more.
I received some horrible news recently. One of the most amazing places I have ever been to has been shut off from the public.
This is the Minister's Treehouse in Crossville, TN. It was made by a man named Horace Burgess, who inspired by God set out to create the world's biggest tree house, which he succeded in making 11 years later.
I visited a few years back and it was one of the most amazing experiences of my life. Maneuvering the tree house is like walking around in an M.C. Escher painting. There winding stair cases, trap doors and all sorts of hidden rooms.
At the heart of the Treehouse is the Chapel, which doubles as a basketball court.
Inside the Chapel I found a group of peaceful earthy people. There was definitely a good vibe emanating from this place.
One gentleman who saw me taking pictures asked me if I would take a picture of him ringing the bell. He charged with me up the large winding staircase to the tip top of the treehouse and rang the bell which is made of old acetylene tanks.
After ringing the bell he said, "Hey watch this!" He flipped open a secret trap door and vanished. I never saw him again. Another couple told me how they were married in this Treehouse and how they are always checking on it to make sure it is safe and clean. They also explained that Mr. Burgess allowed travelers to sleep in the Treehouse. There was a small apartment in the bottom that was no longer occupied as the traveler had moved onto Florida.
Recently the local fire department has closed down the Treehouse citing it as a fire hazard. Another example of small Government gone mad.
I hate that we live in a world were fire safety trumps magic and whimsy.
There is a online petition to reopen this fantastic place. Please sign it if you would like to see this magnificant place.
